Book Review: "You can't run" by Mandy Thomas

Good Evening All,

Weekend has sadly come to an end. I hope you made the most of it, for me it was chilled. I met with one of my close friends for a coffee and chats and then I spent most of it fishing reading the book I am about to review. The name of the book is "You can't run" by Mandy Thomas and it is based on a true story. I got this book as a birthday gift from my friend Camilla whom I worked with in my last job. Up until last week I didn't get a chance to actually read it and once I started I couldn't put it down!

I got this book particularly as myself and Camilla spoke about another book I was dying to read by Ashlee Birk "The Moments we Stand". One day I was watching Dr. Phil on daytime TV (as you do) and Ashlee had been on it telling her story. It got me so intrigued that since then I have been searching for this book. Because she is an American author and it is not a best selling novel per say, you can't actually purchase it in Europe unless you download it. Call me old fashioned but in the age of Social Media and Internet I still like to be able to sit down and read an actual book without having to use an electronic device. I love to turn the pages and sense the new book smell. Anyhow, myself and Camilla spoke about this book few days before my birthday and God bless her she was trying to get me this book but again with no luck, so she got me "You can't run instead" as it touches similar issues.

I could not put this book down. The story is of a girl who falls in love with a boy (starts quite typically) and ends up in a violent relationship. The story starts around 1984 when Mandy is roughly 18. Over the course of their relationship Dusty's (her partner) violence towards Mandy is growing and getting harsher. Firstly Dusty starts to insult her, her looks, her behavior and is laying down the law. He is mentally limiting her and abusing her. Slowly but surely he forbids Mandy to see her friends and what little family she's got left, until she's left with nobody to turn to to talk and help. He isolated her from the world and locked her up in their apartment.

His violence started from a slap and ended up in almost taking her life. Due to the course of their time together he sexually abuses her and she falls pregnant number of times. This is happening for years and Mandy portrays well how the system: The Police, The Social Workers and The Refugee Centers didn't know how to deal with abusive, sexual predators back then and how to protect their victims. Every protocol written up until then was in benefit and rights to the predator rather than the victims.

Mandy had to survive for her 5 children he fathered and that was the only thought that kept her breathing during his tortures.

If you have weak nerves don't read this book as it is very detailed and because it is based on real life events it makes you worry for Mandy as you keep reading. From the beginning of first assault you wonder "Is she going to die?"

This subject may not be to everyone's preferences, however I am so interested in this type of topics and I watch a lot of true story movies as it really makes you appreciate what you have in life. When I met with my friend Debbi for a catch up and was telling her about this book, she said the statistics show 1 in 5 women are abused in their relationship. This makes me think - which one of my friends could potentially be abused? What happens behind closed doors? Often the victims are so petrified for their own life, that even when they have the opportunity to speak out they won't in fear for their life or in Mandy's case her children's life.

This book is written by Mandy herself and she now is hugely involved in helping victims of abuse and ensuring the services that are available know how to deal with the victims. Her torture went on for 18 years.

It is extremely eye opening and makes you think WHAT CAN WE DO TO HELP? I will definitely seek to help the victims in some way whether it is in a local office or in some other way as this subject moves me deeply and makes me so angry. If you know anyone who is abused or you suspect of, don't walk past, don't stay silent as you may be the one to save their life.

You can view services Mandy is involved in on www.mandythomas.com

Have a lovely week ahead,

As always,

Lots of Love

Joanna xoxo